Dear fellow parents…

Dear fellow parents

Dear fellow parents,

We’re writing to you to tell you about our daughter.

She loves One Direction, and knows most of their songs by heart. She loves to sing along to the music, and is fascinated by all the bits of trivia that a true fan devours. She will make an excellent trivia team member one day as I’m sure she’ll be the only one who’ll be able to name all the members and their first hit.

She is a great friend, very loyal and loving. Holding those dear to her with an almost naiveté; not understanding that humans are varying shades of grey. Instead she will continue to look for the good in those who have shown her kindness well beyond a point when they deserve it.

She’s a good student; while sometimes easily distracted and seemingly uninterested, she absorbs knowledge like a sponge. And when you find that thing that she’s interested in, it’s like lighting a spark behind her eyes as she delves into her subject and shares her findings with anyone who’ll take the time to listen.

She’s funny. Seriously. She’s quick witted and her humour comes from a wry, studied place. As if she’s got an internal joke running. Curious about us, all with our worries about the unimportant (to her) things, while she concentrates on life’s big issues, she seeks connection in humour. Laughter is a great leveller.

She’s generous, with her time, her praise and her love. If she likes you, she’ll try her best to show you, even if her methods are at times, unconventional. Give her time. The true joy is when you get past the prickly and confused, loud and over-compensating exterior and find the shy, anxious girl within who just craves to be understood.

Yes, she sometimes calls out in class and personal space is a concept that we’re still working on. Yes, she can be abrupt and rude and dismissive and at times, inappropriate. Yes, at times she struggles to hold up the facade and cries like an exhausted toddler.

By this point you’re probably wondering why we’re writing to you? Why it’s important you know all of these things about our daughter?

Because she has autism.

Because we’re asking for, no, instead we’re requesting with all our hearts, that you show her tolerance and acceptance.

Because we beg for you to understand that she’s learning and she doesn’t do it the way your children do.

Because we’re working with her, along with an amazing team of professionals, to bring out the absolute best in her.

Because she’s our little girl. And we love her more than anything in the world.

Pretty much exactly like you and your girls actually.

So, while our differences may seem large, they’re actually not as great as the similarities that we share.

We hope that this last point is the one that you remember long after you’ve read this and moved on with your day; so that if your girls come home and mention our little girl, that maybe a piece of this will have stayed with you. And you’ll try to understand.

With love and thanks.

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Comments

  1. Love you xxx
    Caroline recently posted..Tonic Waters ReviewMy Profile

  2. Amy {The Misadventurous Maker} says:

    This is beautiful. I’m not sure if you’re actually going to give it to your daughter’s classmates parents but I really hope you do. I think it will make a big difference. To you, Poss and the other students and their parents. You’re such an amazing mum Renee. Poss is incredibly luck. And you are incredibly lucky to have such an awesome kid.xoxo

  3. I think our daughters would get on so well, and if they did go to the same school no letter would be at all necessary. Apart from the 1D thing! Does Poss tell others she has autism? I think she should just tell everyone she’s a blog star and tell her friends (and thereby their parents) to google her name 😉

  4. Anna Donald says:

    Well said, said with love. I just have days where I want to shout it out. To make people understand, not just to understand my son but the daily trials I go through in helping him. Why his brother and sister play up, act out. It’s survival on bad days.

    But it’s those sweet times, the cuddles, the innocence that aspies have. I wish all people could experience it.

    My son is the quirky kid.

    I’ve lost my train of thought, but well said. I wish I had the guts to do the same for my son.

  5. Just beautiful. Poss is so fortunate to have you as an advocate and mum x
    Née recently posted..Goodbye house…My Profile

  6. Wow. That is so beautiful. I love this idea, and I think I would like to do something similar when my daughter starts school. Thanks so much for sharing. xx
    Jane@The Hesitant Housewife recently posted..Autism. Where I Stand.My Profile

  7. Sonia Lifelovehiccups says:

    Seriously I want to hug you and your little girl. Perfect just perfect xxx

  8. Maxabella says:

    This makes me want to cheer and cry and hug the world. Every child deserves a letter just like this. x

  9. Beautifully written Renee. xo

  10. What a beautiful letter xx
    bigwords recently posted..In the Blink of an EyeMy Profile

  11. Renee, if I received ths as a class parent, I’d want to adopt you all. I hope you shared this beyond the blog, put it into the school bags of the other girls who share similar and equally complicated challenges, yet their parents refuse to acknowledge them. You are brave and so is Poss. Far more than those that choose to throw a few words your way as a form of defence for their own insecurities. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent or a perfect child, we’re all just doing the best we can, but I reckon if there was an Optimist Prime for honesty, you’d win it every month. Xx

  12. Just lovely. I am studying to be a teachers aid and I look forward to all the special students that will cross my path. A moment to be cherished forever. V x
    Vicki | Style On V recently posted..loving ROBYN LAWLEY FOR MARIE CLAIREMy Profile

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