So, no more.

You will find that you have to let things go

I have recently had a bit of an inspiration.

There are things in my life, and people in my life, which make me feel like rubbish. I don’t enjoy them, I avoid them and they create stress when they are inflicted on me.

You have to understand, that often it’s not the fault of these people or things. I am sure they are lovely in their own way. They have their own appeal. They just don’t do it for me. They’re not my people. Or you know, they make me stabby. It could go either way.

It’s that old, it’s not you, it’s me. Except when it’s you.

Some of them are small things. Things I can click away from, or unfollow, or simply not read, even if the link-bait online makes it hard. They are opt out things. Some though, some are bigger. Some get in under my skin. A few make my heart race and my skin go clammy.

In the past I have worried about being nice, or being seen to be nice, so I endured. I smiled and nodded. I played the game.

But earlier this week I had lunch with a good friend. It was fabulous; the phone stayed in my hand bag and the kids played for hours in their pool. We talked and talked and lamented the fact that with both of us working we rarely get the time to connect for more than a passing word when dropping our girls off at each other places.

It was during this conversation, as I listened to my wise friend, that I had my realisation.

I don’t spend enough time with the people I love. The people who inspire me. Doing the things that fulfil me and make me happy. I miss reading books and blogs, I miss seeing my friends and spending time with my daughter. I can’t remember the last time I scrapped or sewed. I don’t bake anymore (which may actually be a good thing!). I don’t sleep as much as I should.

My head is full and a lot of it is unnecessary. It’s overflowing with the miscellaneous. The things that don’t matter to me. My time is precious. So is my head space.

So, no more.

No more will I be smiling and playing nice.  I will be un-liking and un-following. I will be saying ‘no thanks’ to invites. I will be simply disengaging in some situations, and if pushed, I will push back.

It’s a realisation that I need to balance my time and my attention more. I need to have space to think, to grow and to dream. By removing the miscellaneous, I hope to find some clarity.

Wish me luck?

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  1. Good luck Renee, do what makes you happy, for the rest will still be there which ever way you go. I am trying to simplify my life a bit too and do what makes me happy. I have soooooo much scrapping to do it’s bloody ridiculous. lol.
    Mandy recently posted..School Footwear with BettsMy Profile

  2. Oh wow… we must be on the same wavelength! I have started to unfollow and unfriend people who annoy the hell out of me or don’t have the same values/ ideals as I do. Sure, they are probably lovely people but not ‘my’ people as you said. I’m also cutting back on social media time, so I can spend time with ‘me’ doing things that I want to do… like reading or watching a movie. I’ve also made a pledge to see at least one friend per week… no exceptions. Oh and get out there more and meet new people! I need to get out of my ‘Kellie’ shell.
    Hope it all works out for you, hun. x
    Kellie (stylishkellie) recently posted..A must GO to festival for womenMy Profile

  3. Good luck sweets, I admire you for taking these steps. Think I might have to take a leaf out of your book x
    Caroline recently posted..The Final Countdown!My Profile

  4. YES YES YES. I love this. I need to do the same. We are all curators of our own information world, and to include it all in our mind is simply too much, but it’s so easy to do. AND, like you said, it’s not all about information – it’s about people, people that we love. Thank you for sharing. Inspired to do a bit of un-follow & un-like myself 🙂 x

  5. Snap! Done ! And oh so much better for it too! Killed off one personal blog (mine!) deleted @denwise1 (too much time on twitter) pulled out of IG & guess what. Cc TIME! To read, to swim, to talk to hub…and I felt sooooo much better.
    Yesterday I met up with a blogging friend and didn’t mind that talking for 3 hours over lunch cost me a $15 car park fee.
    So pleased for you Renee & I believe it will be a blessing at home with Miss Poss as well.
    Denyse xx
    Denyse recently posted..Who’s Off To School Soon?My Profile

  6. This is a great idea, facebook was once a thing for me, then I got really strict and my personal page is really restricted. It makes a big difference.
    Claireyhewitt recently posted..Unblogged in the GrampiansMy Profile

  7. Good luck! I did a lot of that last year but its crept back in. Thanks for the reminder to get back on top of it. I also miss doing the things I love. Xxx

  8. Love this! Have been doing it for a while – quietly unsubscribing from blogs, unfollowing on social media and clearing the clutter in my hands and my head. Now to stop enjoying all this alone time and get back to catching up with lovely people 🙂 xx
    Natalie Barnes recently posted..Drowning but wavingMy Profile

  9. Nicely written Renee, as akways!

    It’s so true, we spend so much time in the unimportant things in life and we forget about living.

    If there is one thing I’ve learnt this year (and it’s still early!) is that even though we think we don’t have time, it’s self inflicted.

    Make time, smell the roses…..

  10. I was nodding in agreement throughout this post. It is sad that we make too much time and effort for the miscellaneous and the stuff that really doesn’t matter.
    I downloaded a great meditation app called ‘Headspace’ (it’s free!) and it’s amazing how much lighter your head feels after just 10 minutes – to take the time for it to be mindful rather than fill it with crap.
    Wishing you lots of luck…you can do it!
    Grace recently posted..Is Australia racist? Or multi-cultural?My Profile

  11. I love this post. Love the thinking and doing behind it.
    I have been thinking along the same lines. I thought it would be harder then it is… but you know, I have read books, watched movies with the kids,spent time with friends that I want to be with.
    Wishing you lots of luck x
    Naomi recently posted..Running HabitMy Profile

  12. Spectacular plan my dear, keep us posted, ox
    Hannah recently posted..In A Nut ShellMy Profile

  13. Renee, isn’t it true! Every now and then I need to re-assess and push away all the unimportant / time-wasting / things that don’t make me happy but I feel obliged to do – stuff. Isn’t it great to regain your clarity and as you so nicely say ‘Balance’. Amy x
    Amy recently posted..Weekend Words: Get your craft onMy Profile


  1. A real mum says:

    […] child. I try not to read articles like that, it makes me stabby and comes under the title ‘things I can avoid to make me stabby‘. But read it I […]

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