Such an inspiration…

Inspirational.

To some, it’s something that they find physically unattainable, yet aspire to. Maybe a sporting achievement, or climbing a mountain, or the like.

To others, it’s qualities that they admire in others. Maybe their capacity to volunteer, giving time and energy to a cause, or their capacity to forgive something that others would find hard to swallow.

I am not sure which one I fit into but, I am sometimes called inspirational.

I assume it’s not because I am an iron woman or planning on climbing any mountains anytime soon, because you know, well, I’m not.

Inspirational

But it perplexes me.

It’s usually said after I have shared something difficult about parenting Poss and it is often delivered with a sympathetic smile. Sometime they even put a hand on my shoulder.

“You are such an inspiration”.

Why? Because I get up each day and am a mother to my daughter?

Because really, surely, I am not doing anything that any other parent would do.

Our road might be a bit different to others, but everyone has challenges they have to deal with. Some far worse than ours. Does that make them all inspirations too?

When people say it, I find it hard to swallow. It puts a wall up between me and them, changing the surface we both stand on, making it uneven and ensuring I no longer feel comfortable sharing difficult things with them.

They say “I couldn’t do what you do”.

But really, I think they mean “I wouldn’t WANT to do what you do”.

And that’s ok.

But I don’t need your sympathy and I don’t want to be your inspiration. I simply need your understanding and support.

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Comments

  1. Maybe, they think you go above and beyond what they think other Mums do. Maybe you are a great parent AND employee. And then you go and top it off by being so nice and friendly and enthusiastic and joining in other projects and being a part of more adventures.

    Just maybe they are talking about more than you as a parent.

    You don’t have any sympathy from me, but you do have my admiration for your energy levels to do so much.
    Claireyhewitt recently posted..The evolution of a wrap.My Profile

    • Renee says:

      Thank you so much for your comments Claire.
      And thank you for your non-sympathy and kind words, and I truly value your admiration, no matter how un-deserved I feel it is ;)

  2. You know what Renee? You are an inspiration, because you get up every day and mother your daughter. Because you do do with grace and dignity. Because you share your journey and help others in doing so.

    And I say that with not a trace of pity or sympathy, just admiration.
    Katesaysstuff recently posted..Playing with my balls.My Profile

  3. jody says:

    Beautifully written. xx
    jody recently posted..{this moment}My Profile

  4. Hannah says:

    Yes.
    When people say that they make you different.
    But your not, your just walking a different path.
    I’m inspirational too… if that’s a comfort.
    Such a big word to through around.
    ox
    Hannah recently posted..In My GardenMy Profile

    • Renee says:

      You are an inspiration lovely girl – certainly if I am, you are!!
      But you are spot on, it makes us different. And sometimes we are already different enough.

  5. Cindy says:

    People say the same thing to me too and while it doesn’t sit with me either I take it more as a ‘I couldn’t do it .. and appear as sane as you are’ or ‘I couldn’t do it … and would need to complain more’. I do what I need to do cause if I don’t no one else would and to me it is that simple. I think too, that those that throw those sentences around, that if tested would probably rise to the occasion – isn’t that one of the things that happen when you are a parent?

    • Renee says:

      You are spot on Cindy – I think they would rise to the occasion, you just don’t know until you have to live it how you will react. And I think most people would surprise themselves.

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