There’s a particular strength in determination. A resolve to stick something out, persist until it’s done, completed, to see it through. It’s almost a stubbornness, a single minded view to make sure you don’t fail. And it’s a quality that Poss has in spades.
Sometimes it’s infuriating. Her overwhelming need to push on through can be exhausting. There are times when I have to bite my tongue from saying “just let Mummy do it” and pushing her aside to just get it, whatever it is, done.
Especially when she wants to be perfect at everything she does. To get that level of expertise, on absolutely everything, takes time. I’m generally pretty impatient. Actually, so is Poss. So it can make for tears.
However, in saying all this, I know it’s one of her best qualities.
It’s easy to forget how hard little things, the things that I take for granted, can be for her. From working out what order to put her clothes on, whether it’s socks or shoes first, or even what foot those shoes need to go on, it’s all a learned thing. A thing that needs to be repeated until she masters it.
There’s no doubt that her stubbornness comes in handy.
So when she takes on a bigger thing, I tend to worry. I worry a lot actually, but when she sets her mind on a big thing, it sends my worry-o-meter to a new level of worry.
I hate to see her disappointed. I hate to see her shoot for the moon and not make it. That’s when I start biting my tongue again, and wish I could just step in and do it for her. Make it right. But sometimes it’s not like putting on her shoes.
When she announced she wanted to do all three Victoria Weet-Bix TRYathlon events, never having done a triathlon before, it was one of those moments.
But today, as I watched her cross the finish line of her third triathlon in as many weeks, I had to remind myself that sometimes it doesn’t matter if you don’t reach the moon; to paraphrase an old saying, she will still land among the stars.
And land among the stars she did. From the first event, where she finished the event and broke down in tears, she’s come so far. Today she grinned from ear to ear, proud and happy with her achievements.
She coped with someone accidentally moving her stuff in transition, she managed to run on the beach (the other two events have been on firmer footing) and she nailed the swim, even though it’s taken her three goes to get the right stroke.
The look of determination on her face that the camera captured as she pounded the track, says so much. Completely focused, stubbornness written in her eyes, a single minded view to just finish.
And finish she did. And we couldn’t be prouder.