We’re still here

We're still here

Some nights the laptop has just sat lonely, looking at me from the edge of the coffee table where I’ve placed it, almost guiltily, out of reach. I’ve tried not to look at it, but it’s cute silver body catches my eye whenever I glance towards the kitchen.

Other nights, I’ve sat with the lid open, the white space of the blank page staring back at me. My fingers try to type, but for once they are much faster than my brain and the words just don’t come. I close the lid again in frustration.

But the words; they still come. Usually when I’m driving, or in the shower, or waiting for my coffee. Completely unhelpful really. I try to hold onto them, but by the time I get home and process all that is happening with my new job, trying to squeeze in a few precious hours with Poss and being a wife, they’ve simply vanished.

So the white screen stares at me. The laptop mocks me.

This weekend, Husband took Poss (and MIL who’s over helping with school holidays)  down to the country to see family. Despite working yesterday, I had still hours on my own to process. To sleep. To watch back to back episodes of the West Wing. I even had my nails done and I may have done some shopping.

It seems ridiculous that I should need this, given we’ve just arrived back from Bali this time last week, but there it is. The week in the sun was amazing, rejuvenating, fun; yet it seems like a lifetime ago already.

The sleep helped. The quiet helped. And tonight I opened the screen and the words have fallen out my head onto the page. They’re probably rubbish. But that’s the thing I’ve learnt about writing; you have to keep doing it, pushing through the dry spells, for there to be any gold come out.

So please stick with me while we adjust to this new normal. I expect there’ll be days when the words will disappear by the time I come to write them down, others when they’ll have been exhausted by the office and others still when they’ll just be crap.

But we’re still here.

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  1. I regularly try and upend the laptop into the bin but I know, come the end of the day, I’d be ferreting around in the rubbish picking potato scraps and other kitchen muck from the front of her silver magnificence. Sigh. Meantime, please tell me what on earth you are trying to grow in the vase?

  2. Hi Renee,

    I’m glad that we have heard from you. I was wondering where your journey was taking you.

    Enjoy and revel in the new and carry it through your day.

  3. I have written my first short story, I am going to enter into a competition in Tasmania, I edit it most days when I get home after work, adding bits, taking out bits, an hour a night, wondering if all those bits fit together. Some days I have nothing some days I’m writing notes. Finding somedays im empty, some days I’m full. I love to read your writing you were born to write x
    Rae Hilhorst recently posted..Pilates – Yoga – Walking – BicyclesMy Profile

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