And such is the joy of parenting…

That and coffee.

After almost a week of false starts and half attempts, Poss finally returned to school yesterday to start her year properly. She’s been sick. And in the nature of her body, our poor little Poss has probably been sick for quite some time without us knowing about it.

She simply doesn’t feel things until the coping limit is well passed, or you know, she stubs her toe or we accidentally pull her hair – because it’s all about extremes in her world.

She’s had one condition that’s been compounded by another, both of which would be a bastard to have on their own, let alone together. They seem to be fairly common in kids on the spectrum, but this offers little comfort. Luckily, as horrid as they are, they’re very treatable and generally speaking, children come good pretty quickly.

But, we need to get better at reading the signs and taking action sooner. Not waiting until she’s crying and vomiting, in pain on the bathroom floor. Insisting and nagging about medication, not stopping just because she seems fine or she tells us she’s ok. Bring back some picture charts and be prepared to stand our ground. Lessons in Parenthood 101.

Alongside that, she also needs to learn some self care, and it’s our job to teach her. To help her recognise the signs, show her how to avoid getting to a point where a trip to the hospital is required before 7am on a Sunday morning. Because really, nobody likes me before my coffee. Not even me.

We also need to reinforce with her how good it is to be healthy. Yes, when you’re sick you get special treatment, but then you get better. She’s lucky to get better. And when you do, your whole world opens up again, school returns, the new friends she’s made are waiting for her and that life goes on.

It’s not the first time we’ve been down this path, and I suspect despite all the attempts to not be here again, we probably will be. It’s only a matter of severity and timing.

I lamented to a friend, while we were waiting at the hospital, that this isn’t in the parents manual. Nobody warns you of these things. Nobody tells you about the vomiting, the poop (that goes on well beyond the baby years) and the gut-wrenching fear you’ll feel when they’re ill. She reminded me that if they did, nobody would have them.

And such is the joy of parenting. That and coffee. Especially on a Sunday morning.

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  1. Oh, what a miserable Sunday morning that must have been! It sounds like a really tricky thing to manage. I find even with my non-spectrum kids, they don’t always tell me about symptoms until later than they should (though not that late!), and also that it can be so hard for me to figure out just what it is they are feeling, from their description. Do they have a little gas, or is it appendicitis? Or maybe just a stictch? By the time you’ve grown up you’ve – moreorless – figured out the conventional ways to describe things you feel in your body. But as a child, you may have heard a particular phrase that seems to fit, so you use it, not knowing that for adult listeners, it has completely difference associations than you mean it to have.

    Hi, by the way (should have introduced myself on my last comment!). I’m Kirsten. I just surfed in from somewhere 🙂
    Kirsten McCulloch recently posted..One Cloth to Clean it All (Well, Almost) – Announcement & Giveaways!My Profile

  2. Poor love. Hugs to all of you. Feeling the extreme pain of returning to school. It was a mosquito bite that sent D over the edge ending in full, day of psych today for all of us. Tired and emotional …. Takes its toll. Gx

  3. Noella Hextall says:

    Poor Poss and poor you! I had a similar thing happen to me last year with my ASD daughter (without the hospital trip) and I promised myself that I would have to take extra notice to the “I’m fine” when I waa concerned about her health. I hope Poss enjoys a full week of school this week!


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